Brightest Day #12
This issue of the bi-weekly Russian roulette of comics known as Brightest Day kicks things off with Martian Manhunter on his home planet of Mars. He confronts the other Green Martian that's been killing people, and she's waiting on J'onn with a candlelit dinner, wine and some oreos. Are you kidding me? Two pages in and this is what I'm typing?! Anyway, They talk about boring crap like how J'onn hates her but loves her cause she's Martian or something then they fight. She basically says she's been on earth all these years but got so used to being a human that she pretty much forgot she was Martian until J'onn came back or something that sounded just as dumb as it does when i describe it. So they continue to fight and the female Martian keeps trying to merge with J'onn but he fights her off, then the JLA show up (Superman, Batman, Classic Wonder Woman, Guy Gardner for some reason...) They beat him up and imprison him in a Green Lantern made tomb, and of course it's clearly not the real heroes. Anyway, we jump over to the returned Black Lanterns, and Firestorm flying after them. Jason sings Ronnie's praises while trying to hype him up as they charge after the Black Lanterns. Suddenly a voice similar to the White Lantern voice tells Deathstorm and the rest of the Black Lanterns to bring him the White Lantern, then they just teleport away. Yeah, because that's one of the MANY powers Black Lanterns have, even though it was never mentioned for the NINE months we read about them. They're so stupid they can't even SEE you if you hide your emotions, yet they possess the amazing ability to all teleport at will, twelve at a time. We get a quick jump over to Dove, and she's helping Deadman a.k.a. Boston Brand figure out who the new Champion of Earth will be as asked by the White Lantern. Back with J'onn he figures out that the JLA isn't real, because he has a brain. He then gets mad and starts "Donkey Kong'ing" the female villain. (By the way, to Donkey Kong means to repeatedly hit on the top of the head, and/or bash into the ground.) He then says "Live!" three times like Beetlejuice and it causes all the plants and Martians on the entire planet to come back to life.... Okay, What the ****? REALLY?! Anyway, the comic throws us a quick curveball and the issue ends soon after. If not for that curveball I'd give this comic a zero outta the sheer stupidity of it, but I'll be nice and give it the amazing 1/10 it deserves. Keep up the "good" work DC!
Me: Why am I still reading this crap?
Power Girl #17
This issue of Power Girl features a team-up between our Busty Blonde Bombshell and The Caped Crusader himself. We start off with Peej and Batman raiding a warehouse full of goons that look like low-rent Storm Troopers. We also get to see how Power Girl thinks of Dick Grayson as Batman, and how she loves Bruce but Grayson made the transition so smoothly and looks like he's having fun as Batman, even while hiding it with a scowl on his face. A funny moment happens where PG asks a guard for info and he pretty much curses her out and blasts her in the face, but since Power Girl is almost invulnerable she just thumps his helmet off and stares him in the face waiting for an answer. When Power Girl and Batman find the head honcho in charge, they make quick work of him and get the info they need. Before Power Girl can head to Antarctica where the tip led her, Batman advises her to be careful. When PG asks when she's not careful, Batman whispers asking her if she wants a list, which she of course overhears. I like that Judd threw that in because it's a nice way of letting Dick Grayson shine through the way we know him, even when he is Batman. From there we see Power Girl searching around Antarctica with her X-Ray vision trying to find the place that her lead from earlier mentioned. She's suddenly knocked out of the sky but something very fast and very strong. Power Girl tries to take on the guy while she has Nicco scan him for weaknesses but he's too evenly matched with her. With some information from Nicco, PG soon discovers that the mysterious attacker isn't human, and can make himself bigger at will. As the fight goes on we get caught up with the glimpses of this fight we saw in issue #16. Nicco finally gets some interesting information to Power Girl by noting the villain has Kryptonian cells. The issue ends with a hell of a cliffhanger that left me wanting to see how it goes from here. This was a nice solid issue, it flew by really quick and that's how I know I enjoyed it. Nothing amazing or mind-blowing happened (besides the reveal) but everything else was well-written and enjoyable. I'd give this issue an 8.5/10.
Power Girl: Dude. Get a grip. I just tore open the four-ton door to your safe room with my hands. And Batman is standing next to me. Of course you're scared.
Batman Beyond #5
Before I start this review I just wanna congratulate the writer Adam Beechen and his talented art staff as well since it was recently announced that Batman Beyond would become an ongoing series starting in January. Great work guys and gals. Anyway, the issue starts with the Cadmus Labs employee trying to reach Commissioner Barbara Gordon with information on the new Hush, but she's interrupted by a Cadmus Security Agent who tries to return her back to Amanda Waller. We see Batman laid out and almost dead as the recently revealed Hush walks away. Catwoman shows up soon after, and when Bruce links himself with her costume through an override program. He convinces her to help Batman, and when she unmasks we find out she's related to Danton Black a.k.a Multiplex, which explains her being able to multiply herself. As Bruce helps talk Catwoman through helping Batman he's attacked by his big Batman Robots. Back with the Cadmus employee, she's finally caught by the security guards but is saved by a shadowed figure, who we soon find out to be Dick Grayson. When she see's Dick Grayson she passes out as he catches her. Back in the Batcave one of the Bat-Robots pins Bruce down, until Hush re-routes them and has the Robots fly to him. Back on the streets Batman regains consciousness and thanks Catwoman for helping him, but it doesn't take long for Bruce to chime in and tells Terry to return to the Batcave. Batman warns Catwoman to stay in for the next few nights and be safe because this isn't her fight. We jump over to Commissioner Gordon and the Cadmus Lab employee, and we find out her name is Nora Elliot Reid and she's the granddaughter of Thomas "Hush" Elliot. We find out that the current Hush is not Dick Grayson but actually a clone made of Grayson's memories by Amanda Waller under her quest to make sure Gotham always has a Batman. I thought this twist was genius by the way, and it made sense in the context of the story. Next we jump back to the Batcave and see Terry arrive just in time for Bruce to patch him up and save his life. But the issue ends after a shocking message from Hush that he may try to replicate the events of No Man's Land. I thought this was another great issue, I loved the explanation of the Dick Grayson stuff because when we saw his alibi it made sense, so this was a great way to explain everything. I can't wait to see how the six and final issue of this mini ends things. I'll give this issue a solid 8/10.
Babs: Dick... Are you okay?Dick: I haven't been okay since I was about eight years old, Babs, you know that.
The Road Home - Catwoman
The Catwoman-centric issue of Road Home kicks things off with a look inside of Bruce's White Casebook. He says that Selina has been his beacon of getting home through time, and the person he's wanted to come back to the most. Now he has to see if she has changed in his absence and how she'll fit into the new plans he has for his crime-fighting agenda. Next we see Selina Kyle and Pamela Isley at a fancy party at Club V (for Villain) to keep an eye on Vicki Vale. Just for the record, Peter Nguyen did a great job in showcasing both women, they look amazing in terms of drawn women. While following Vicki Vale, Selina and Pamela stumble onto a criminal auction, and one of the items for bid is a rare Pink Mynx, which prompts a flashback for Catwoman. We see her crash a fancy event and steal the Mynx, but too bad for her, Bruce Wayne was there. He quickly follows after her as Batman and demands she returns the Pink Mynx. Batman and Catwoman fight on top of a blimp, and the fight causes her bag to rip and the Mynx to fall into the water below. When Batman helps her up and tries to comfort her while cuffing Catwoman, she sucker punches him and runs off yelling "Next time I'll steal your heart!" Selina's memory is cut short when an uninvited Harley Quinn, full in costume, storms into the club. Harley's upset because her Hyena's are up for sale, so she pulls a sword out and starts "Slashing prices" and freeing all the animals. When Harley is about to be overwhelmed she gets a little help from Ivy, meanwhile Selina notices that Vale has left the room with all of the commotion going on. Selina contemplates stealing the Pink Mynx since no one would notice, but sticks to her priorities and follows after Vicki Vale. We then jump over to Vicki who says her informant never showed up, but she's not giving up on the case. She then gets a call from the informant who tells her to met them at a diner in twenty minutes, she says she'll be there in ten. When she leaves her apartment Catwoman enters in it soon after. Selina takes pictures of the "Batman Family Tree" that Vicki has on the wall, and moves back a big curtain next to it and finds that Vicki has an even bigger wall of secrets with pictures of Hush, Joker, the Sirens and more Batman villains. Vicki soon returns but Catwoman is gone by the time she arrives. Catwoman is then sitting on the roof when she says "Stealth means invisible. Apparently it doesn't always mean silent." The Mystery Man a.k.a. The Insider appears and Selina looks him over before giving him the information she acquired. They talk about how Vicki is dangerously close to getting in trouble herself by finding out who all these villains are, and when Bruce says a certain thing Catwoman realizes that The Insider may be Bruce. The issue ends soon after, and the Road Home continues to be full of nice solid stories. This one was just as good as some of the others, not as good as Batgirl, but a perfectly acceptable comic that showed us another side to the enigma that is Selina Kyle. I'll give this issue a 8.5/10.
Catwoman: A bit too... Robotic for my taste. The people who meet me on rooftops generally wear capes.
The Road Home - Commissioner Gordon
Like the other Road Home issues, we start off with an excerpt from Bruce's White Casebook. He talks about how he worried about Jim Gordon in his absence, and he can't be Batman the way he is without Jim Gordon by his side. From there we see Jim Gordon, a fellow officer and Vicki Vale are in some type of dangerous situation. Gordon commands the team and tells the Officer and Vale to head for the stairs while they cover him. Gordon continues to lead the officer and Vicki away from the people that are shooting after them. We then go back a few hours and see Oracle as The Insider shows up next to her, she doesn't ask him questions, and he tells her to find out who leaked the information that Vale has (as we saw in Road Home - Catwoman) and to let him know where Vale is when she finds out. Oracle agrees as The Insider leaves, but we see from his remarks in the casebook that he thinks just from that meeting that Oracle knows he's Bruce Wayne. Next we see a very gritty looking Penguin, thanks to the grimy and dark artwork he actually looks intimidating, as he decides to give to would-be villains, Charger and Roundhouse a shot at going after Vicki Vale. As Gordon arrives at a protective custody place, to help watch Vicki Vale, she plans to try to extract information about Batman from Commissioner Gordon. Gordon quickly shuts her down by saying that a hundred dangerous villains are looking for Vale all because of her digging into Batman's secrets. Vale tries to punk out Gordon by reciting stats and saying that Batman does all his work, but Jim Gordon disputes them all with ease like the professional he is. Gordon talks about how the GCPD choose to work with Batman instead of make life hard for him because the millions of lives he's saved outweighs his vigilantism. The lights soon go out and Gordon discovers that a seventeen year veteran by the name of Korsch has betrayed them when he pulls a gun out on Gordon. Gordon stays calm and waits for a diversion before shooting him (?), it's hard to tell since the art is so dark and gritty. We then appear to be caught up with our open. We see The Insider get a tip about something fishy over at the Aames Hotel, where Vicki and Gordon are. He arrives there just in time to help his dear old friend Jim Gordon. Soon after we see Vicki Vale apologize to Jim Gordon for treating him like an old, worthless dinosaur. She thanks The Insider as well, and when Jim says something to him he turns around and notices he's gone, and I'm sure Jim picked up on that subtle hint. Oracle then tells The Insider that the news of Vale's findings was leaked by a representative of Ra's Al Ghul, setting up our next One-Shot. This was a fine story, nothing great but solid. It didn't capture me as much as the others and I feel like that dropped it's rating in my eyes, but it was a solid story, I'll give it a 6.5/10.
Vicki Vale: I didn't get your name.The Insider: That's because you're a reporter and I know better.
Green Lantern Corps #53
With the scourge of Cyborg-Superman out of the way, what will the Green Lantern Corp have to deal with next? Let's find out, shall we? We see many years ago on the Planet Qward, the Weaponer making a small object out of fear while using his Blacksmith's tools. We soon find out that what he made was the first ever yellow power ring for Sinestro. We find out that Sinestro has a deal with the Qwardians, one we can only assume he hasn't repaid yet. We then fast forward to see Sinestro's daughter, Green Lantern Soranik Natu. Kyle is calling Soranik but she appears to have her hands full with some intergalactic poachers. Turns out Kyle was waiting for Soranik on her home planet of Korugar and he ended up having to save lives, because a heros (oh yeah!) work is never done. The crowd cheers as Kyle saves them, meanwhile the Sinestro Corps members just watch, since the truce with Sinestro means they can't attack Green Lanterns but they don't have to help them either. Soranik tells Kyle she'll be there soon and that he shouldn't start a fight until she gets there. Kyle can't help himself and provokes one of the Yellow-clad ring bearers, he makes one angry enough to fight but the other two members leave because Sinestro would skin alive anyone who breaks his truce. Kyle scares the hell out of the remaining guy by listing his accomplishments (see below), but suddenly the Sinestro Corps Member is smashed by a huge hammer and instantly killed. The wielder is the Qwardian from before, he attacks Kyle, asking where the real Green Lantern, but Kyle fights back and makes an awesome suit out of his ring that would make Lex Luthor cry like a child. As they fight, the Qwardian says he derailed the train kyle saved to lure out the Lantern of Korugar. When Kyle asks how he plans to use his hammer to fight a power ring, the Quardian uses his shield to scan and reconfigure his hammer into an amazing white weapon that I can't even describe. He uses the weapon and it shatters Kyle suit in an instant, then comments that he was forging power rings while Kyle was still in diapers. He comments that he can see every weakness and imperfection in something then configure his weapon into something that can destroy it. Well, that's just plain unfair is what that is. He introduces himself as The Weaponer (laaaame) and Soranik arrives to help Kyle. The Weaponer is glad to see her, and calls her the daughter of Sinestro, which surprises her since hardly anyone knows that. She tries to rush him but he causes a bunch of white insects to appear and one stings her and causes paralysis. The Weaponer takes down Kyle and says if he wants her back safely then to tell Sinestro he has his daughter, and he wants him to come to Qward and die on his knees for everything he's done to The Weaponer and and his world. We then see Sinestro standing over some kids on Halloween as he just watches them. Kyle quickly flies in and explains what happened to Sinestro. The issue ends soon after but not the way you'd expect. I know GLC is a solid story but I feel like I have to make myself read it, but I jumped into this issue and never looked back. The story was great, the mystery, the confrontation with Kyle and Sinestro and the always beautiful artwork, it's probably the best drawn comic today in my opinion. I'll give this issue a solid 10/10 rating and recommend it to anyone that wants to jump into a great story.
Kyle Rayner: You're talking to a guy who went toe-to-toe with your Master... who beat Parallax... who mopped the floor with everyone from Mongul to Oblivion.
This cover explains all there is to the comedy of Deadpool, and my child-like sense of humor. Anywho, this issue starts with the New Avengers, Steve Rogers, Black Widow and Moon Knight on a stake out of a place that's suspected to be harboring a bomb. While they talk it over they realize Deadpool is missing, and suddenly a huge explosion takes place before walking up stating he "bombed their asses!" Moon Knight gets upset because they are supposed to confiscate the bombs, when DP asks why Steve responds by saying "For blowing up terrorists!" to which Deadpool replies that he just did that. One point for Deadpool, zero for America. Steve gets frustrated and walks away, calling someone and saying that he can't handle Deadpool. They talk him down and he goes over to Deadpool and tells him he doesn't like him. Deadpool jokes around more and Steve tells the team to move out, and tells Deadpool the next time he disobeys orders he'll be off the team. When Deadpool asks "What, the volleyball team?", he's promptly punched in the face and knocked out by Steve Rogers. When he awakens later he argues with himself about blowing his chance to be a hero like he's claimed he's wanted over the past few months. We then see that Deadpool is being watched over by the evil, meticulous fiend known as Doctor Bong! Dun Dun dunnn!!! We also find out that the "New Avengers" are just clones, as I assumed they weren't real. Next up we see Steve, Moon Knight and Black Widow (the real ones?) staking out a building and getting a game plan ready to go check it out. We then see Steve in a building walking around and Deadpool runs up to him to apologize but instead gets a swift beating from the former Captain America. In the midst of the beat-down an alarm goes off. We see the Doc Bong with the clones of Moon Knight and Black Widow watching Deadpoon and the real Steve Rogers through a security camera. We then see the clone Steve run up to the roof for some reason but he's picked off by Black Widow with a sniper. As Doc Bong and his clones realized their trapped he tells the clones that he was the psychiatrist of Deadpool, and if there's one thing Deadpool hates more than himself it's his friends. Meanwhile, the real Steve is beating the hell out of Deadpool, and he finally gets angry enough to fight back. Deadpool takes it to the Super Soldier while saying he believed Steve really wanted to be his friend but in the end he wants to use Deadpool like everyone else. Deadpool continues to work Steve over, saying how he would have let him use him because he thought they were friends, but Steve turned on him because Deadpool is so much better at crime-fighting than he is. That was a mistake because that lit a fire under Steve. The two brutally beat each other senseless until Moon Knight tries to join the fight, prompting Steve to stop the fight and try to talk to Deadpool, but the talking is soon cut short by the villainous Doctor Bong! I really enjoyed this issue, it was fun and we got to see Deadpool joke, but also his more sensitive side. The fact Deadpool can come off more human than Steve Rogers sometimes is interesting, because Deadpool is that guy that doesn't fit in and can't really find a friend he can trust, so I think we can resonate with him. Anyway, this was a really fun and interesting issue, I'll give it a 9/10.
Deadpool: I used to really look up to you, man. When you asked me to join your team... I couldn't believe it. Almost. Shoulda known you didn't really wanna be my pal.... you're just like the rest of 'em. Out to use me.
DCU Halloween Special 2010
Instead of going through every comic I'll just mention the story titles, what happened and how I felt about them. The first story is called "Trick for The Scarecrow", and it's a fun little story I enjoyed about a bunch of kids dressed as Batman who somehow capture Scarecrow and douse him with his own fear agent, making him think there are four Batmen! (including Brave and The Bold Batman and the Christian Bale Batman.) The next story is called "Robin the Vampire Slayer", which pretty much tackled the subject of Batman and Robin killing vampires to help Andrew Bennett. This story was okay, I didn't mind it but I didn't love it either. The next story features The Flash and Frankenstein and is called "Time of your life." Yes, it's as dumb as it sounds, basically Frankenstein is in love with Iris and wants her but Barry has to save her, it turns out he's her friend because she's some type of vampire....Anyway, moving on. The next story is a surprising pairing of Wonder Woman and Deadman (still dead) in "A Night to Remember." This story is about Felix Faust with the help of Cheetah trying to bring an powerful, Evil God into the world and Deadman teaming up with Wonder Woman to stop them. This was a pretty good story as well, and ended like you'd expect but it's nice to see Deadman in something other than a crap-shoot like Brightest Day. Our next story features Klarion, the Witchboy (Throwback!!!!) and the Teen Titans in "Medusa Non Grata." This story sadly wasn't all that great, the best part was Miss Martian changing costumes in every panel when this story starts off. The next story on our list features Superman and Etrigan and it's called "Fears of Steel", this was a great short story where we see Superman's fears, not unlike when he had Starro on him, except we see him being betrayed by Batman and accidentally crushing a very old Lois Lane but he's helped conquer those fears by Etrigan. That's it sadly, no big story to arc all the short stories together, just a bunch of short stories. This was fine but nothing amazing or worth going out of your way to get, I'd give it a 5.5/10.
Batman: Splendid detective work, Caped Crusaders. I'll take it from here.
Well that's all for me this time, but I'll be back this week with another edition of the Top Five 5! As always, send me your top five choices for each of the five categories at KevinKavalier@gmail.com and the Top Five 5 will be posted this Sunday, as well as a new weekly poll and the results from last week's since I forgot to update it. Also, a special shout out to Kello, as he submitted all five of this week's topics. The topics are below, and I'd recommend sending me your picks as soon as possible so you don't forget. Well that's all for me, until next time I'm your Friendly Neighborhood Blogger-Man Jason Todd, signing off.
Top Five Funniest Characters
Top Five Memorable Deaths
Top Five Hottest Characters
Top Five animal inspired characters (ex: Black panther)
Top Five characters that would make the most dysfunctional team ever
Next Time on Ratings and Rantings
Action Comics #894, Bruce Wayne - The Road Home Oracle and Ra's Al Ghul, Green Arrow #5, Justice League: Generation Lost #12, Carnage #1, Kick Ass 2 #1 and Teen Titans #88 (Maybe, haven't decided yet.)