Ratings and Rantings featuring Batgirl #1

Hey Todd Squad, hot off the heels of the debut of the "new" DC Universe, we've got quite a few books to get to, so no time for a long-winded intro. So let's get things kicked off with two books I missed last week so I could get the review for Justice League #1 up.

Invincible #82

That is one upset green chick on this cover, she makes She-Hulk look like a pacifist. We start things off seeing that "Rex" has returned, and after a few space years on another planet, he's ready to get back into the swing of things on Earth. Surprisingly, Cecil Steadman offers the man formerly known as Robot to pretty much lead every team and hero that Cecil has contact with, and Rex says he'll do the job since he has nothing else to do, pretty much hinting that something happened to his relationship with Monster Girl. From there we see Invincible go meet with our cover girl, who blames him and Eve for the death of countless innocents while Invincible tries to apologize, until he gets her to shut up long enough for him to talk. Before we can see what he says, we jump over to see Eve and Kate eat salads together, and Kate keeps taking shots at Eve's weight, although she's slowly starting to lose weight due to using her powers which burn calories. Back at the Pentagon, Cecil is alerted that Dinosaurus is not only alive but also in the building, but in his human form to turn himself in. Over with Invincible, he talks to our Green Queen Killing Machine, and tells her he understands that she was there to save her own people and was desperate, so he's going to try to get them to release her, and after she agrees not to hurt anyone, she is in fact freed thanks to Invincible. She vows to repay Invincible for his kindness one day as she heads off to her home planet. Back at the Pentagon, Cecil asks Invincible if he can count on him when he needs him, Invincible says yes but he may be done crime fighting in the near future. After a quick talk, Cecil tells Mark he hasn't been all that truthful with him, as he shows Mark the Reanimen he and D.A. Sinclair have created as this issue comes to a close. This was an alright issue, nothing really happened though. It was more verbal problem solving like the last few issues, and although we saw Robot return with a smoking hot Monster Girl, and we know Universa will be back but that's about it. I'll give this issue a 7/10 rating.

Eve: Actually, Mark likes me the say I am.

Kate: He does? Really? Weird.

The Amazing Spider-Man #668

We pick up where things left off with Spidey being helped up by Shang Chi, who recognizes it's actually him, and this is confirmed by Wolverine. Spidey wants to join the fray but Luke Cage tells him to leave since there's so many Spider-Men and they don't want to risk caving his head in by mistake.. again. While Pete sulks and changes outta his Spidey costume, he runs into MJ who tells him to get back in the game, as she points out Carlie who's using her powers for good to help people, and seems to be the only civilian doing so. Realizing MJ is right, Peter hijacks a camera from Norah and proclaims he's a New Yorker who also developed powers today, and that everyone should use their powers to help save the city. Surprisingly, Pete's crusade works as he leads a group of New Yorkers to the fight to stand alongside the Avengers and the other NY based heroes. After a battle, the New Yorkers and Heroes take down the rogue Spider-men. Soon after, Mayor Jameson announces that everyone who helped has been deputized as Spider-Island is quarantined, and he's counting on them to help keep the city safe. We also see Mary Jane may be jealous of Carlie, considering Pete's former beau doesn't have Spider-Powers. Over at Horizon Labs, Peter discovers there's someone working on a cure with Reed Richards, someone only known as Number Six to keep their identity a secret. Reed asks Peter for a DNA sample to help out. Next we see Eddie Brock as Anti-Venom healing someone against their will of their Spider-Powers, as he proclaims he's going to help everyone, Madame Web steps out of the shadows behind him, saying to herself that both Anti-Venom and Venom are needed, but this is also where the story ends for one of them. Interesting. Back with Pete, we see that he's been sent by Max to work at Carlie's department and help fix tech for Jameson's Anti-Spider patrol, but after a quick talk with Carlie, she reveals she has a lead with The Jackal, Miles Warren. Pete kicks himself for not thinking of that sooner, and heads out with Carlie to follow up on it. As they arrive at Jackal's last known base, it looks as if Peter and Carlie may be walking into a trap as this issue closes. Now this was a pretty fun issue, I like that Peter gets to be Spider-Man without being Spider-Man, and fighting crime with Carlie is new and fresh and also pretty fun. I'm just wondering how long it takes for someone to mess up, since I'm pretty sure no one else has Spider-Sense either, but I'll give this issue an 8.5/10.

J. Jonah Jameson: Why in all my years in this city, I never thought I'd... Parker?! With Spider-powers?! Now I have seen everything.

Static Shock #1

We start tings off with S.T.A.R. Labs newest employee, Virgil Hawkins fighting crime as his alter ego, Static Shock. Static is now in New York and his first job is stopping Sunspot from attacking his new job. After a bunch of bad jokes and some trial and error, Static takes down Sunspot, but also manages to disable a bunch of cars, cell phones and other electronic devices, which pisses off the ungrateful New Yorkers. Once Sunspot realizes his force field has been taking down, he says he has to escape because some people are going to kill him, but before he can finish his sentence he's shot dead, which doesn't seem to bother Static at all as he traces the bullets kinetic energy back to the gunman. Well that annoys me, Static was a teenager who seemed to care about others, the fact this dude died while Static basically held him there would've at least bothered him. Plus all these bad jokes and electricity quips sound like Mr. Freeze in the Batman and Robin movie. Static's view of the kinetic energy gets messed up by the sun setting (damn Sun!) so he leaves, unaware five people on hover-bikes are watching him. He then talks to some guy named Hardware that I guess is his younger more active, African-American Alfred. He tells Static to head home because his parents are probably worried since they know his job was attacked. Meanwhile we see the hover bikers who are known as the Slate Gang at a base explaining to villain known as Piranha who Static is and how he was stationed in Dakota.They decide Static is one hero too many in New York so they send a hulking brute by the name of Virule. Well alrighty then. After showing a run-in with his family, we see Virgil go to his secret base which apparently is courtesy of Hardware. As Static flies around New York he's attacked covertly by the Slate Gang, who shoot at him and apparently shoot his arm off as this issue ends....What? Okay, first things first, if DC is trying to gain new readers by rebooting they have truly fucked up. I'm a pretty hardcore reader, I read some of Static's older comics, I read all of his DC stuff up to this point, and I watched his show, and the ONLY person in this comic I recognized besides his family WAS Static. Nothing was introduced, if you knew nothing of Static beforehand you're only going to be more confused now, and the reboot was supposed to kill the confusion right? Also, if Virgil loses his hand, on one page, while the page on the left shows a solicit for Aquaman it's quite possibly the most unintentionally funny thing I've seen. Anyway, this issue was pretty convoluted and the cliffhanger seems pretty unnecessary one issue in, I guess I'll give this a 4/10.

Static: Arrest me? You got it all wrong! They were just eager, real eager to get my autograph and my fingerprints.

Justice League International #1

We start things off with the Government deciding they need a team they can control, they can take credit for if they succeed and blame if they fail. After deliberation and passing on certain heroes like Green Arrow (who would be too unruly), Blue Beetle (because he's a rookie), Batman (he'd be harder to lead) and Plastic Man (who would be insane), they decide on a Booster Gold led team, featuring Fire, Ice, Vixen, Rocket Red, August General in Iron, Guy Gardner and Lady Godiva, a character introduced in Flashpoint. After that we see a team of researchers vanish due to some weird earthquake that swallows them whole... interesting. Later we see Booster Gold arrive at the Hall of Justice, wondering where Superman and Wonder Woman are before finding out this is a different Justice League. This Booster is apparently the version that loves being the center of attention so I REALLY hope this is an act and he's still the hero we've read about since 52. When Booster meets the rest of the team, everyone seems up for the task except for Gardner, who refuses to let Booster lead the team, and storms out. Booster refuses to go after him and says he has to come back on his own or he won't respect Booster at all. We also see Lady Godiva apparently has a crush on Booster as she keeps hitting on him. As Gardner leaves he's stopped by Batman, who says he believes in Booster and he knows he can do this. Gardner says he refuses to follow his orders why Bats, Supes and Hal are on the main squad. He tells Bats if Booster is as capable as he thinks he is, they'll do fine without him. Later, the newly formed team are giving a Jet by Queen Industries just to spite the X-Men I guess..., also, August General and Rocket Red argue because apparently Russians and Chinese people don't get along. As the team goes to look for the missing researchers, Booster tries to make it to the cockpit, before he wonders who's flying the jet, he arrives to find out it's Batman, who wanted to lend a hand to our Golden Boy. Booster thinks that Bats doesn't believe he can lead the team, but Batman says it's because the JLI is short-handed, and the JLA thinks it;s good to have a link between the two teams. As the JLI searches for the missing researchers, we see two rogue civilians blow up the Hall of Justice because they don't like the U.N. "buying off" their heroes. Back with the JLI, they're suddenly attacked by some rock monsters that climb up from underground, the JLI fight them and make the rock monsters retreat, but suddenly a giant robot shoots forth from the ground as the JLI go on the defensive and this issue ends. Now THIS was a good issue. It shows Booster has still grown up, and clearly he and Bats prior conversations happened because Bats believes in Booster. I like that the team has a dynamic where everyone is still feeling one another out and there are really no set friendships besides Fire and Ice and Bats and Booster. This was a good start, and although we don't know a lot about each character yet, it definitely set some storylines into motion, I'd give this an 8.5/10 rating.

Booster Gold: Does the U.N. know you're here?

Batman: I've always enjoyed your sense of humor, Booster.

Batgirl #1

We start things off with a villain named The Mirror, he has a list of people and he walks up to a man named Graham Carter, who survived a sinking ship when twenty-seven of his fellow sailors did not, the mirror then takes a water hose from Mr. Graham and puts it in his mouth until he drowns. Well I like this guy already, he's killing people in ironic ways where they "cheated death". It's like someone took the plot for Final Destination and instead of making like eighty movies they just made him a supervillain. Anyway, we see Barbara Gordon is next on his list. From there we see a Red-Headed Batgirl (Sorry Stephanie...) dropping in to stop a bunch of criminals that break into homes and murder parents for fun, known as the Brisby Killers. Batgirl takes them down left and right, and knocks one of them out cold, which she attributes to "having arm strength like a mother" now. After a stand off, Batgirl manages to save the family and take down the criminals, but she thinks to herself how rusty and scare she was during it all. We then see Babs in bed, having a nightmare of when The Joker shot her, which was three years ago for those interested. We see Babs get out of bed and walk to the kitchen where her father is sitting as Babs explains to us that she was shot through the gut with a spinal cord injury and how she couldn't use her legs for three years until a miracle happened which allows her to walk, but we get no insight on what exactly happened. We then see her talk to her dad and she explains it's time for her to move out. We then see Babs moving into her new apartment, where she has a roommate named Alysia that works nights, which works for her Babs' alter-ego. Meanwhile, we see one of the criminals Babs thwarted is in the hospital, and The Mirror has found his way inside and killed a guard. Babs gets a police report text since she's wired her phone to get her dad's police messages. She gets her Batgirl costume on and pulls out her Bat-Cycle (memories) and heads to the hospital. As she arrives, The Mirror finds the criminal from earlier and states that he should've fell and died during his fight with Batgirl. Batgirl arrives to stop the Mirror but he pulls a gun on her and she freezes, which is expected given her past. The Mirror then grabs the criminal's bed and runs him towards the window (I always wondered why they have those huge window-walls at hospitals...) and pushes him out before turning a gun back on Batgirl, as a downed police officer calls Batgirl a murderer for letting him kill the criminal as the issue comes to a close. First things first, that dude isn't dead, I'd bet anything that Batman, Robin, or Nightwing caught him. Secondly, how is Batgirl a murderer for not doing anything... meanwhile the woman accusing her also did nothing. Anyway, this was a good issue, there's still a lot of questions but after reading JLI and Static, I's say this was closer to JLI in terms of being a good reboot story, so I'll give this issue an 8/10 rating.

(Edit: In the scene where the guy is pushed out of the window, he has one eye... so..yeah.)

Civilian: Bless you. Bless you Batwoman.

Batgirl: Well, close, I guess, and you're welcome. And the name's Batgirl.

Morning Glories #12

We start thing off seeing a character named Miss Hodge return to Morning Glories academy. Interestingly enough, to get to the Academy you apparently have to take a elevator then a vehicle through a huge underground radioactive cellar until you get to the school... that's pretty wild. Apparently the MG students love Miss Hodge as she's joking and laughing and giving advice before she finally gets to her office. As she looks through some papers she notices something and heads to see a student that was murdered, looks to be the one Zoe killed a few issues back. After seeing the bodies of other dead students in the morgue, Miss Hodge pulls Miss Daramount out of her classroom and questions her about the bodies and if "he" knows, to which Daramount says the Headmaster knows. Hodge then pulls Daramount's sleeves up as we see she has all types of cuts and marks on her arms, courtesy of the Headmaster. Hodge then says she needs to spend time with these new kids and she already has permission slips signed. When Miss Daramount asks Hodge what she's going to do, Hodge says the same thing she always does, bail out out of trouble with dad. What? Apparently Hodge and Daramount are sisters and the Headmaster is their dad. Miss Hodge quickly finds Zoe and has her come to her office and gives Zoe a gun, she tells her to keep it close and make sure she doesn't get searched. She tells her that her records show she's going to need it. Interesting... after that Miss Hodge meets with Jun, their conversation is brief but we see she basically helped him get into Morning Glories, obviously to save his brother. During her chat with Jade she gives her some pills that should help her stop having nightmares and throwing up, that is if she wants to stop having the nightmares. During her meeting with Hunter, she mentions him having a problem with time and how he always see's the same time. She then says that his files have everything he's done and ever will do, including him having a crush on a certain classmate, but when she shows them to him they show that the files are blank, as she asks how he suppose that works. After that Miss Hodge goes to meet with Ike but walks away and mumbles "not yet" to herself. Lastly, we see Casey go back to the site where she last saw her parents in issue one, as Miss Lara Hodge introduces herself and asks if her friends know yet about Casey's parents. She says that she's being held there too, even as a faculty member she's still stuck at MGA. She also says Casey's file says she goes there everyday, which is how she new where Casey was, and her parents loved her very much, which annoys Casey so she socks Miss Hodge in the mouth and says she doesn't trust her one bit. Miss Hodge tells her she could never escape Morning Glories Academy but now she can with the help of Casey, and she can help her burn Morning Glories to the ground, when Case asks why she would ever believe this, Miss Hodge says what if she said she could bring Casey's parents back, as the issue ends on a huge cliffhanger. Now this was a great issue, I really like Miss Hodge, she may or may not be trustworthy but I like the character as of right now and this issue was informative and set a lot of things into motion, it answered questions but started new ones as well. I'll give this issue a 9/10 rating.

Zoe: Who in the hell are you, anyway? And why are you dressed like a zookeeper?

Miss Hodge: I'm your guidance counselor, Bitch. Now get in the goddamned office. (Awww snap!)

And that's it for this week everyone, thanks for reading and be sure to check out the results for last week's poll. Even more important, be sure to vote on this week's poll, because depending on the results, next week may be the last Ratings and Rantings! So vote and let me know how you feel about that. Anyway, that's it for me, until next time, I'm your friendly neighborhood Blogger-Man, Jason Todd, signing off!

The last poll asked "Which DC Comics are you picking up this week?"

Last place with 0% - Flashpoint #5... I'm not even going to make a joke.
Third place with 10% - No DC Comics for me this week
Second Place with 30% - Justice League #1, This was me as well..
Winner with 60% - Justice League and Flashpoint #5, So... learn anything about the DCnU?

Next Week on Ratings and Rantings

Batman and Robin #1, Deathstroke #1, Green Lantern #1, Grifter #1, Amazing Spider-Man #669, Ultimate Spider-Man #1, and Deadpool #43.